Lieutenant JG Sol "Smalls" Ambrose |
Seth Green as Sol "Smalls" Ambrose |
Name: | Sol "Smalls" Ambrose |
Alias: | Smalls |
Age: | 27 |
Hair & Eyes: | Red hair & blue eyes |
Faction: | Hestia: Air Wing (Furies) |
Position: | ECO |
Colony: | Leonis |
Play Times: | Varies |
Timezone: | — |
Biographical Info
History
Between his parents, Sol "Smalls" Ambrose didn't have much in the way of successful social role models. Oh, Mrs. Ambrose was kind-hearted and pleasant enough. She also was as loquacious as three million parrots on speed recorded and played on an infinite loop. Dr. Ambrose tended to be more interested in tinkering, coding, and building complex computer systems than he was dealing with people, unless said people enjoyed geeking out and discussing all the stuff he was passionate about. Poor Sol inherited the worst traits of his parents. Thankfully, he got the best ones, too.
If there's someone to thank (or blame) for how he ended-up as an ECO, it's his mother because she's the one who got him into computers. (Well, six children whose names really don't matter also played an important role. After all, if they hadn't bullied Sol every day for what shall be termed as personality conflicts, Mrs. Ambrose would not have decided that her runt of a son should stay indoors as much as possible.)
Lively children need something to do, though, so activities were needed. It was evident by the way he ruined his mother's prize-winning azaleas that gardening wasn't going to be it. Drawing and painting were also out of the question after all the walls were marred with mediocre drawings. That just left computers, which suited his mother just fine because now his father would have to deal with it, seeing that he was a programmer.
It just so happens that the boy took to it like a Marine takes to swearing, shooting, and frakking. Not only did it capture his interest, he turned out to be quite the prodigy. Scripts and code led to more complex programming and even some hacking. Software was useless, however, if the hardware failed, so he threw himself into that, too. First, it was taking apart the machines to see how they worked. Then he would put them back together. After a while, he started building his own. In high school, he had a lucrative side-business constructing, upgrading, and repairing computers for his classmates. Eventually, this expanded into personal electronics, such as video game consoles and portable music players. If it involved hardware and software, he wanted to how it worked.
Whether it was complex programming or designing and building computer systems, Sol was well-equipped for the rigors of earning a Masters in Computer Sciences & Engineering from the University of Delphi. During that time, he acquired a particular interest in cryptology, largely because he liked the idea of communicating in secret codes and enjoyed the challenge of cracking them. It helped that, over the years, he'd memorized the binary bit strings for each letter, number, and character in the Standard language. This made coversions to hex, octal and base-10 rather seamless.
Not having very much of a social life, he spent the bulk of his free time working as an intern at some top tech firms, including one that developed ECM devices for the military. Building systems became too time intensive, but he spent most weekends repairing various electronic devices for his classmates, which earned him enough income to buy parts and equipment for his assorted personal projects. When he finally graduated summa cum laude, Ambrose had his pick of job opportunities.
He opted to become an ECO.
Prior exposure to ECM devices, as well as an understanding of the underlying technical principles resulted in faster than average learning. The only reason he didn't graduate ranked at the top of his class was because he talked too damn much. Unnecessary chatter on the comms did not go over well.
So, how'd he get the callsign "Smalls"? It just so happens that 'smalls' is a northern Aerelonian colloquialism for underwear. It also just so happens that Ambrose packed an inordinate amount — in different styles and colors, no less — and one of his northern Aerelonian wingmates happened to notice, one day. Quickly, he pointed it out to another northern Aerelonian.
"Oi, mate. Check out all 'is smalls!"
"Why th' frak d'yu need all dem smalls for?"
"Aphrodite's tits! Check th' wais'bands. Dey've got 'is name wri'en on 'em."
"Oi, seriously… why th' frak d'yu need all dem smalls for? Fo' pairs are enough."
From then on, those two kept calling him "Smalls". Eventually, it caught on with everyone else.
The name (and 32 pairs of quality underwear) went with him when he was poached from the Battlestar Aeson on PHD 60 to replace an ECO who was killed in Hestia's botched Picon mission. So far, no one's seen fit to change the callsign. Perhaps this is because "Whiplash" is from Aerelon and finds it funny. (Really, the guy does have a lot of undies.)
All the same, it didn't take long for "Smalls" to demonstrate his skill as an ECO, or that he's able to make ECM system repairs. In fact, he's usually pitching-in when it comes to fixing and running diagnostics on the ECM equipment. Considering that his life depends on such being operational, he does whatever he can to keep it in top shape. In fact, up until Warday, he was in communication with former colleagues at the ECM development firm, gaining further insights into the equipment, resulting in better troubleshooting and repairs. If only he didn't talk so damn much on the comms, he'd be an ideal officer.
Family
Sol is the only child of a kindly but somewhat socially inept couple that was happily married up until they were incinerated on Warday. The family also had two cats — Mr. Whiskers and Mr. Fluffykins — who likewise were involuntarily cremated on that day.
Education
- Masters degree in Computer Science & Engineering from the University of Delphi. (Graduated summa cum laude.)
- ECO training.
- The School of Hard Knocks
Reputation (or Mil. Service)
Ambrose is an excellent ECO and really would be an ideal officer if he just didn't talk so frakkin' much. He's a bona fide computer nerd, as both a programmer and an engineer, and really has a great understanding about how ECM devices work. Coupled with being an accomplished cryptologist, he really should be doing recon with the Wardogs and not working as support for the Furies. Chances are that he's kept so close to home because he is apparently incapable of keeping his mouth shut for very long. All that comms chatter defeats the purpose of being sneaky.
Distinguishing Features
- Mouth like the Energizer bunny: it keeps going and going and going…
- Lack of height.
- Red hair styled as though he recently licked an electrical socket.
- Slim build despite eating copious amount of junk food.
- So pale that his bare chest can potentially blind someone with its glare.
- Questionable taste in women, including a string of borderline-to-honestly crazy ex-girlfriends.
Trivia
- "Smalls" is a colloquialism for underwear that is primarily used by northerners in the UK.
- Seth Green claims to be 5'4" tall, which is why Ambrose is that short.
Skills
- Incessant Yacking
- ECM Use & Fixing
- Running His Mouth
- Computer Programming, Engineering & Repair
- Chatting Too Much On The Comms
- Writing & Cracking Codes (i.e. Cryptography & Cryptanalysis, aka Cryptology)
- Avoiding Going Hoarse Despite His Loquaciousness
- 01000011 01100001 01101110 00100000 01110010 01100101 01100001 01100100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01100001 01110011 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101111 01110101 01100111 01101000 00100000 01101001 01110100 00100000 01110111 01100101 01110010 01100101 00100000 01110011 01110100 01100001 01101110 01100100 01100001 01110010 01100100 00100000 01110100 01100101 01111000 01110100 00101110
- Engaging In Small Talk & Pleasantries
- 43 61 6e 20 61 6c 73 6f 20 72 65 61 64 20 74 68 69 73 20 61 73 20 74 68 6f 75 67 68 20 69 74 20 77 65 72 65 20 73 74 61 6e 64 61 72 64 20 74 65 78 74 2e
- Making What He Says Frequently Sound Like One Giant Run-On Sentence
- Eating Tons Of Junk Food Without Getting Fat
- Not Shutting Up As Often As He Should
- Washing & Folding Lots Of Underwear
- Blah Blah Blah
On the Grid
Known Associates
Mugshot | The Skinny |
---|---|
Captain Nini "Whiplash" Sito: The CAG is good peoples. Yeah, she tells me to shut my trap in all sorts of colorful ways — especially over the comms — but that's part of her job. So far, I haven't pissed her off too much with all my talking, but I sometimes think that I'm not flying with the Wardogs 'cuz she wants to keep as close an eye on me as possible. That, and 'cuz I'm a frakkin' awesome ECO. Er, apart from the whole chatting too much over the comms thing, that is. | |
Lieutenant JG Iggy "Booster" Nikos: Iggy is awesome and I'm not just saying that 'cuz she's my bunkmate and could easily suffocate me in my sleep. Yeah, she's hot on the stick and hotheaded, too — not to mention smokin' hot — but the most important bit is that she's a good friend. Not only has she more or less stopped beating me up, she's willing to beat-up people who mess with me. I wish I knew her back in grade school. Anyway, I'm really glad she's got my back and I totally have hers. I know people think I'm nuts for thinking that she's nice, but she is, although she'd probably punch me for saying so. It's cool, though. She's a Nikos. That's just what they do. | |
Lieutenant Castor "Shepherd" Leda: Shep seems like a good guy. If he manages to find episodes of Glamazons, he'll be upgraded to seriously cool dude. Well, maybe not seriously cool dude. Just cool dude 'cuz he fails to fully recognize the badass hawtness that is Booster. One of the Viper jocks from the Kharon, he's really loyal to those peeps, and I respect that. I also think he might've gotten used to having those tight bonds, so he's kinda forgotten how much time and work it'll take to forge those ties with his new family. |
Timeline of Events
Title | Date | Summary | Other Participants |
---|---|---|---|
Fight Night: The Reckoning - Part I & Part II | PH 246 | The first Fight Night since the merger of crews. | Pretty much frakkin' everyone |
Squalling and Squabbling | PH 244 | A conversation between Ambrose and Iggy turns into a confrontation between the latter and Leda. | Ambrose, Iggy, & Castor. |
Ferried To A Ferry By Fairies | PH 233 | Kharon sends some folks to pick up the bodies of their fallen crew. | Capriel, Dane, Fiver, Flowers, Iggy, Jericho, Kai, Legacy, Sito & Ramses. |
Quotes
"Okay, seriously, though, I have no fur on my face. And even if I missed a spot, it's not like I have much aptitude for growing a hobo beard. I managed to have a soul patch for a while, in college, but then some girl I really liked told me it wasn't cool, so I shaved it off. She wanted to shave me elsewhere, too, but I don't think I'll ever have the hots for someone so much that I'd do that, again. It was bad enough that she nicked my nutsack, but it itched more than anything should ever itch when the hair started growing back down there."
— TMI from the ECO
"You want a shoulder rub? I mean, I know you're saying your butt hurts, but I'm leaving here without bruises and I wanna keep it that way, so I'm not gonna offer to massage your ass. Although, y'know, I will, if you want."
— Smalls is a good friend to Iggy post-Fight Night
"I don't have rabies. That frothing at the mouth comes from my saliva foaming from so much talking."
Misc
- Talking.
- Computer programming, engineering & repair.
- Talking.
- Being an ECO.
- Talking.
- Cryptology.
- Talking.
- Having LOTS of clean underwear.
- Talking.
- Frakking-up Cylon sensors and transmissions.
- Talking.
- Super Mega Buzzy Blast: The Energy Drink of Champions!
- Talking.
- That Iggy is willing to inflict bodily violence upon others on his behalf.
- Talking.